I’m currently in my fourth postpartum period, with my youngest baby being five months old(!). In planning for this postpartum period, I wanted to ensure I thoughtfully engaged in self-care. After having three babies in four years while working a demanding job, I am adamant about self-care, and if you are expecting or also postpartum, I want you to be adamant about self-care, too. I know all too well how much of a toll it takes on a postpartum mom to work and constantly care for little ones with no time for herself — my mental and physical health were greatly affected.
I was first diagnosed with postpartum depression in 2022 with the birth of my third baby — I struggled so much to get out of bed and to eat that I had to reduce my time at work significantly in my first trimester. This was prenatal depression that became postpartum depression after delivery. My battle with prenatal and postpartum depression with my third baby woke me up to just how important my mental health is and how seriously I need to take it.
It’s been a two-year battle with my depression diagnosis, but along the way, I have found things to help me take care of myself that go beyond massages, nail appointments, and the like (which I love!). Today, I want to share what’s helped me take care of myself in the postpartum phase to help any pregnant or new mothers.
Taking care of my cognitive health: Cognitive behavioral therapy (CBT) and medication
An important act of self-care for me is taking care of my cognitive health. The health of my brain is paramount, not only because I am dependent on my brain for my capital as an attorney, but because I want to lessen my risks of cognitive impairment, dementia, Alzheimer’s, and other degenerative conditions. Dealing with brain fog, fatigue, sleep disturbance, and a host of other issues affected my ability to show up as my best self.
I started CBT three months into my third postpartum period, and it’s been life-changing for me. Seeing a provider every week gives me the space to process my thoughts and strategies to rewire my brain. My provider also prescribed medication for me to help with my anxiety and depression, which has done wonders for me and helps me show up as my best self.
My therapy appointments are an essential, non-negotiable part of my self-care routine. I hope they become part of yours, too!
Exercise
It’s easy for work to become all-consuming, neglecting my personal health. In fact, in the last 18 months, I was so focused on working and juggling children that I rarely worked out. I felt sluggish, weak, and constantly fatigued.
I now know firsthand the benefits of working out for a postpartum mom. When I workout, I feel more alert and energized for the rest of my day. I used to seriously doubt anyone who said that exercise energized them, since exercise completely depleted me after years of high-intensity training. However, I have learned that effective exercise need not be highly intense all the time. Now, I love low-impact exercises like pilates and strength training and see great results. I recently got back into running, and it feels like I’m getting back something that was lost long ago.
Exercise is a healthy outlet that brings me joy, improves my sleep quality, resolves stress, and boosts my mood. Most importantly, I exercise to be strong and to live a long, active, fulfilling life. I want to treat my body well — after all, this body has carried me for over thirty years, has carried and birthed babies, and endured so much. I am amazed at all my body has done and can do, and exercise is a celebration of movement I can do.
Eating nourishing, nutritious food
Your babies aren’t the only ones who need good, nourishing food — you need it, too. After being diagnosed with depression, I dove headfirst into research about how my diet affected my mood and brain health. While the science is still developing, studies have shown that our gut can impact our mood. Thus, a diverse, nutrient-dense diet can produce microbes that can help heal our gut and, ultimately, our minds.
Based on this, I have moved towards nutrient-dense foods to support my brain health, my gut, and my body. Staying hydrated, aiming for adequate nutrients, and eating plenty of plants have positively affected my health!
Physical therapy
Another part of self-care for me is going to physical therapy. My core has significantly weakened after giving birth to three babies in four years. I have diastasis recti, a condition where the six-pack muscles separate during pregnancy. I healed my ab separation after my third delivery, and I am currently working towards healing right now. Strengthening my core contributes to my overall fitness and ability to avoid injuries when working out and playing with my kids. I highly recommend you see a physical therapist if you can.
Sleep
We’ve all heard how important sleep is for our health, but I did not take this seriously until my mental health was in jeopardy. Before then, I was proud of all-nighters for work (and law school) and grinding away late into the night. Even if it wasn’t work-related, I lost sleep because I was up scrolling on my phone. Now, it’s tough to come by a healthy amount of sleep in the last four years with having babies, but bit by bit, I am gaining back more quality sleep. I prioritize at least eight hours of quality sleep because my quality of life suffers without it.
Alone time
I greatly value time to myself as an act of self-care. I need time alone, in silence, to recharge. Otherwise, I feel “touched-out,” drained, and irritable. The older I get, the more I value my own company!
If you’re feeling down or not yourself, talk to your doctor and loved ones. There is hope — and help. Make an appointment with your provider if you want to be seen sooner than six weeks post-delivery. At your appointment, be open and honest about how you feel physically and mentally. Without self-care, we cannot show up as our best selves.
Thank you for sharing. It couldn’t have come at a better time. God bless